Thursday, May 20, 2010


I can, I will, I must!

Sunday, April 25, 2010

One summer day

When ever the pain I deal with starts to act up, I just think about the time just prier to the doctors at the VA cutting into my back. It was a beautiful day outside and the night before arraignments were made to have our six month old looked after by family so I could go out and call on a hand full of clients, and follow up on leads that needed day canvasing in some of the most drug infested areas of Chicago. I remember this day as if it were yesterday. After a shit, shower, and a shave I was getting dressed, and as I tried to bring my leg up to put my sock on the pain in my back prevented me from doing so. Like a dumb ass, out of brute force I yanked my leg up to my other knee. Before I could reach the knee I felt almost like an electric shock surge through my body. Immediately I fell to the ground in an attempted to straiten out my torso. As long as I kept my body straight I felt no pain. The only problem was I Had just finished with a shower and my cell was on the kitchen counter ten feet away. The only other phone that was close was on my desk and out of reach, I would have to stand up and at this point that was not possible. I started yelling for help, but know one was hearing me. I was going to have to lay there all day or I would have to crawl to my cell. Looking back now, I should have waited. After a little motivational talk with myself, I reach with both hands for some floor and pulled. Immediately It felt like I was being hit by lightning, and I only made it about 10 inches. I did this nine more excruciating times, crying in agony like a baby, screaming at the top of my lungs. It would have been a good soundtrack for a horror movie. Finally I reached the cell and I called my better half at work and filled her in on my last. I don't know how, but she made it home very fast, even after stopping at ace hardware for the bolt cutters she was going to need to cut the chain that I had put back on after everybody left that morning. When she got to the house she opened the door and before she reached up with the bolt cutters, she looked at me through the slightly opened door and we both started laughing. It didn't last very long because as soon as I started laughing the shock hit me again. She cut the chain and the fire department gave me a ride to the hospital where I laid on my back for five more days. I like looking back on that day. I really like the fact that I can walk

The Sun shines on every day

Most of the individuals I come across in my day to day, seem to for the most part go to work, and are in pursuit of a happy place. Then for one day every week, they go to a place called a Church. At this gathering of faithful and giving individuals, a man or woman reads from a book and then gives a presentation of his or her interpretation of what the letters in the book really mean. What I have described to you is what a large percentage of Americas population does on a weekly basis. Then on Monday they all go back to the rat race, and Sundays sermon is gone just like Sunday. Or is it. Why isn't it Sunday every day!? Jesus wants us to live as he did. He knew that man needed free will, and that pleasures of the flesh could only be opposed by the biggest sacrifice of all, his life. As I am out among killers and thieves I say to my soul," I'm going to be just and swift, I will have Mercy, I will not think of myself, but in all party's involved". The Sun should shine on every day not just on Sunday. Sianara.

Monday, April 19, 2010

The Conn

The Conn. What can I say about this studied fellow or madam. That's what they would like to be called by the way. This only because they want all of us to think that they are the new robin hoods. That they only take from everybody and give to themselves. The kind of individual I'm telling you about is one who would like to be a positive influence on mankind, but falls short only because he or she is lazy and decides to take the road most easily traveled. So that's why I will help to stop their unquenchable thirst, the one for the underbelly they seek like the animals they are. To this worthless excuse of a life force I say, I will always get up. Not only to kiss the forehead of my children, but also to be there and meet your advances on the good people of this country. Sianara.

Saturday, March 13, 2010

Everywhere on this small planet we call Earth, is a United States Service member on mission, standing post or on watch for both you and I. Whether its in a forward area, or behind the line, they do this out of duty and honer for their country. For the very same country you and I both enjoy, and are able to live as free men and women. Everybody wants to live in America, but not everybody wants to do their part. Not taking our liberties for granted would be a good place to start. So the next time you see a public servant. Say thank you. Tell them you appreciate the quality of life they provide. The next time your bummed out because you didn't get what ever it is you wanted, just remember its always good to have choices, and in America we have many. Sianara.

Friday, March 5, 2010


Mid life, what does that mean? Does it mean you should go out and live for the moment. Does it mean you fall out of love with your woman or man. Maybe it means you die your heir and get a face lift. To me mid life means I got one chance to try, and now its for keeps. No second chances when you hit mid life. You must hit the nail dead on. If your off for what ever reason just trust your process and follow through. Otherwise you face a barrage of distractions. If you stop and question your ability rather than applying the peddle to the floor, you may miss your mark and this will ultimately lead you down the wrong path. The past is the past and with out it we would not be who we are today. I now believe that it is what it is, and not you or I can change that unless it applies to ourselves. The past may come back out of nowhere. If it does you should embrace it and follow your heart. I really believe we are who we are, when we are, for a reason. Only time will tell the truth. We should try and live for love and love to live. To my brothers and sisters in arms, God speed. Sianara.

Thursday, March 4, 2010

Racing For Autism

One out of every 150 children is diagnosed with autism. Across our Nation Parent's from divers background's face the challenge of living Autistic fluent lifestyles. Parents have amassed enough information to support a PHD. They have become experts on the ins and outs of the still virtually unknown realm of Autism. I know this because my son Niko was diagnosed with Asperger at age 4. He is very bright, but the magic will not show itself unless he himself lets it flow. I have never been able to hug my son and have him hug me back, this action, the one where he is not able to show affection with a simple hug helped me to start a foundation on which to build a better understanding of Autism and how to better interact with my son Niko. I am sharing this very sensitive information so that Parents who are living the Autistic lifestyle will know that they do not stand alone. You are Heroes and I solute you. Don't ever quit, and remember Autism is just a different way to learn. Sianara and God speed. (my son Niko is 13)

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

A friend of mine shared the following. " I am a skip tracer. Finder of lost treasure. He who hunts Man or Woman armed or not for money. I eat sleep and live my work. My targets almost always run, my favorite response only because I can lead them and almost always hit center mast. I'm a Skip tracer. I find those who do not want to be found. My targets are almost always living beyond their means and taking what is not theirs. Only because they can. Like animals they live. Like animals they will be hunted and found. I am a Skip tracer, you can run but you can't hide."

Saturday, January 9, 2010

Do not force your view, lead by example

This life we live, what a ride it has been. Not really knowing if tomorrow is coming is what keeps me going. Today a young woman, one with a significant past (only displayed to me through her emotion), accused me of attacking in order to enjoy the actual act of overpowering with words. I say to her, I will only attack when the apposing force moves forward on the power of others. A piggy back attempt if you will, to declare their own conviction on the rest of use with out regard for the collective group. This to me is the same action as our foes from the far left and right. Who only because of the energy given to them by Anger and Hate are able to tow the time line required to move major issues forward so that all may be counted. This only available to the populous in America. A free land in witch people can exude what ever it is they may deem important to the rest of us, and if we are not able to digest whats being frothed out, there seems to be a common effort to try and force it down our collective throats. Speak your peace, if people listen great. If they do not want to expos themselves to it, let them be. That's my take. God speed to my Brothers and Sisters in arms. You are my Hero's. Thank you, Sianara.